Cigarettes Kill, So do Women!!!

There was nothing to glorify the messy Mumbai weather. It had rained for a negligible twenty minutes in the pre – evening hour just to annoy the sweaty locals. Traffic still confused whether to stay or move, constantly switching their legs between the clutch and the brakes. Midst the chaos, across the street, stood a shattered Pan Shop serving the right intoxication to these restless bastards.

He watched them leaning against the shattered wall of the shop, one by one, buying tobacco to risla, just to walk across the broken lane, only to roll a joint and get lost in their own sorrow. Scribing layers within layers, trying to create a story of their own, lost in translation, simplifying their complications and to forget in intoxication.

He stamped the bud of his second cigarette and was about to leave when he noticed her a couple of yards away, resting against a tree. She pulled out a Classic Milds packet from her back pocket of her shorts and took a cigarette out with her lips, directly. Call it the stars or her drenched lighter, even after successive attempts; she failed to light her smoke.

He walked towards her and elegantly offered her the spirit from his polished, wolf printed, matte finished Zippo. She stared at him skeptically, deciding in her calculative mind whether to accept his offer or not, she did. He picked out his third smoke and lighted it with the same spirit.

‘You think it is going to rain?’ he asked.

She looked at him, confused. But she didn't reply. His eyes were still fixed on hers. She couldn't take that foolish awkwardness.

‘Sorry? What?’ she replied.

‘Rain, you think it is going to rain?’ he repeated.

‘No.  May be… I don’t know.’

And she got back to her cigarette. Twenty five seconds of Napoleon Dynamite silence led to another attempt of vague interaction with her.

‘I think… I think it is going to rain,’ he stammered, confidently.

She looked at him with a half-baked smile and returned back to her smoke. Again. Napoleon Dynamite silence. Again. This was a clear indication to him and he understood that she required her space. She stubbed her almost dead cigarette against the tree and started to leave.

‘Thank you’, she said. It was loud enough for him to listen yet very soft for him to comprehend.

He looked at her walk away, hoping she would look back. She didn't.

The not so glorious day ended just to give way to another not so glorious day. The only thing that was different today was that it hadn't rained.

He stood there, against the wall having his regular smoke.

‘Can I borrow your Zippo?’ she asked.

Glorious Day.

Short Story from a Big Novel

DISCLAIMER: All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. (Sometimes disclaimers are so important).

The best kind of RELATIONSHIP in this world is the one in which a SORRY & A SMILE can make everything NORMAL again.

1.

‘I’d have fallen in love with you if you had done half the things you are doing to her right now,’ she said. ‘She is such a…’

‘Shriya please,’ I paused. ‘Don’t call her that. You know how much I love her.’

‘Shut up Jay. Everyone in this college can see how much you love her. It is only that bitch who is so blind.’

I don’t know what happened to me as soon as I heard her say the word ‘Bitch’. My reflex arc was so quick to react that it had landed my palm on her face. I could see those teardrops which were about to drain from her eyes. She tried to control it.

‘You and your BITCH can go to hell.’

She stressed on the word BITCH in such a way that she meant me to stay away from her as far as possible and left the canteen.

It had been almost a month since I had known Shriya. One of my friends’s introduced me to her. She was from the first year MBA batch. In time we had developed a fondness towards each other. She turned out to be my best friend where as I was her secret crush. And we both knew it would never work out between us or at least I did. She was the girl who actually got me out of my depression stage and who really meant a lot to me. But the problem here was not Shriya. I mean the main problem.

2. 

Priyanka… Priyanka Shekawat... The 5’4 inches typical Rajput girl. Her hair, rich dark ebony black, thick and flows a little lower than her shoulders. Her eyes remind me of a coffee bean, brown yet makes it look like green. What actually fool you into believing that she is got not so mesmerizing eyes are her funny Looney toons orange frame glasses which makes her look cute as well as adorable. A nose job from God justifies her perfect pinky nose. But what is icing on the cake is her smile. I still haven’t figured out how to describe it because no matter what happens when I see that smile coming, all I can do is lose myself. She was the MAIN PROBLEM.

Main problem because I was madly in love with her. And she knew it. I had made that so clear to her by now. It had been a year and a half since we kind of shared this love-hate relationship.

The story was simple. I meet her. She meets me. We become really good friends. I fall in love with her. She semi falls in love with me. We live happily ever after till another 6’foot stud comes into the story. She fully falls in love with him. They start going around. I get jealous and fight with her. We stop talking. They break up. We start talking. They get back. We fight again. They break up again. We start talking again. This drill is repeated a couple more times. And finally the stud is out of the story. But this time we decide not to talk. I mean she decides not to talk.

Though we have never had a perfect love story, we have had our perfect moments ranging from an almost soft kiss at the college terrace to a charming cameo dance in the college corridor. They were so perfect considering the fact that our 12 lakhs would have gone into the drain if we had been caught. I’m kidding. This is the reason why she avoids me. I can really make an awww sounding moment turn into a fart joke. I try my best being serious but then I really blow it off.

But now after all this I just want to be as serious as I can to just be by her side all the time even if that means I lose being myself. To be frank they were perfect moments because there were only three things in it. Me, her and nothing else. It was just like being thrown off from the sky and knowing that there is no ground below, just the sky. Free falling. It was not that I had never told her about my feelings. We both had but it was never on the face. We preferred the virtual world or our phones. I don’t know why we never said it on face. May be because we knew that it was going nowhere or we were really scared what would happen next or we were just fooling around. But now I was sure than ever before. I tell her on her face how much I love her before I get chucked out of this place.

Chucked out of this place? Well that’s another story I’ll share it some other time. But now it was Priyanka Shekawat who was playing with my mind. I wanted go down on my knees and tell her how I really felt. I didn’t want to do a Chethan Bhagat or a Karan Johar stereotype and tell it to her because I had tried it a million times and it always didn’t work out which actually helped me differentiate between what it looks like and actually what it is. 

I looked at Shriya’s half eaten kachori and finally decided that tonight I would walk up to Priyanka and tell her everything. So I packed up everything on my table and rushed to my room. It was four in the evening. I switched on my laptop and opened the traditional Microsoft Word and started scribbling what I should actually tell her when I meet her tonight. This probably was my last chance. I don’t know why but I strongly felt so. One plate of hot maggi and a flask full of hot tea was there to help me out. I hate tea though but I’ve built an unusual liking for it since a fortnight, the reason for which is still a mystery.

3.

It was nine fifteen now and I had reached the food court. I could feel a paper stub in my pocket which was actually a brilliantly articulated Proposal Letter an hour ago. I rehearsed it better than my Fresher Party’s Play Script in the last three hours. And I was dead damn sure she would surely fall for it. And then I noticed her coming. She as usual was accompanied by what I always called a DOB Squad (Darts of Brainwashing). I called the leader of the squad Ms. Mahalingam (she kind of reminded me of that plane owner from Talespin). But they didn’t matter to me anymore. I saw her taking her regular last seat. Mahalingam signaled her that she would be getting the food for her so Pri removed her phone from her pocket and started texting. I took my last restless breath and started walking towards her.

‘Pri…’ I said. ‘I wanna tell you something.’

She pretended as though she heard nothing and continued texting. That really pissed me off. But I had decided I would not lose my temper today.  I tried again. She didn’t reply. This time I got frustrated but then again I didn’t show it. I held her hand and said ‘Pri, can you please listen to me for some time?’ She pulled a typical girl thing as I held her hand, that frown like ‘don’t you dare touch me you filthy dog’. I did feel offended but it was a natural thing that a girl does when you have really pissed her off and I had actually pissed her off that bad.

This was my time but. I had to undo everything I did including calling her a BITCH. Yes, even I had called her a BITCH and I dead damn knew that she wasn’t one. So I just went on my knees.

‘What the FUCK are you doing Jay?’ she kind of whispered. ‘Everybody is looking at us.’

The word ‘US’ sounded like Enrique playing ‘When you say nothing at all’. So couple iiish. But I just wanted it to be like that forever.

‘I wanna talk to you. It is really important.’ I pleaded.

‘I know what you wanna talk and I’m really not interested in your cock and bull shit. You know what? I’m leaving. Go to hell.’

She stood up and banged the chair and started to leave. And I still was wondering why every girl wants me to go to hell.

‘Pri can you please FUCKING listen to me?’ I shouted. 

I was still on my knees.  She had walked around five yards. She stopped and turned back. Now there were more than 300 eyes on us. The whole food court was looking at us as though she had raped me and I was here for my compensation. She was getting conscious about the unexpected attention she was getting. But something told me it was going to be alright from now. She looked at me and understood I was actually serious this time. She folded her hands against her elbow and gave me a look which meant ‘go on, I’m listening.’

‘Pri listen I know I was being a dog. I shouldn’t have been one. All I want to say is…’

This is when God makes you realize that he exists. He has got his own sense of humor. And this time he cracked his joke on me. When I was about to start my three minute speech which I rehearsed a million times in the past three hours I actually remembered that I had forgotten the first line. I mean how I could forget. Here I was in between 150 odd people in the canteen, on my knees, looking at the most beautiful coffee bean eyes figuring what am I going to tell her after I pulled this unexpected Karan Johar stereotype which I prayed to God to not let it happen.

‘All I want to say is…’ I continued searching for words. ‘… let’s end it once and for all. I don’t want to talk to you ever. I’m tired fighting with you and I can’t do it anymore.’ I swear I had no idea what I was saying but words just came out like shit when a sewage pipe breaks. I dead damn knew that after this there was no second chance.

‘Ok kool.’ She said and started walking away.

‘Dhammu wait. I know I’m acting like a jerk.’ She stopped and started listening to me. ‘I don’t want to. I wanna act normal. I wanna be just like you want me to be. Smart, sensible, funny not sarcastic funny which you hate but normal funny. I know I am not that guy. But I get to closer to him whenever I am with you. I try my best to ignore you and then figure it out that I have noticed you more when I am ignoring you than when I am actually noticing you.’

People started to pay more attention now than ever. I gave a damn.

‘I mean I just can’t help myself by not looking at you.’ I continued. ‘Every time you notice that I’m noticing you, you try to pretend not noticing me noticing you but yet end up noticing me and curse yourself for that. The way you check your cell every two minutes just to see if you have got any messages, like you press the menu key, see you have no messages and then just push the phone in frustration. The face you make when you see the canteen guy serving paneer on your plate. The way you pinch Rhea’s cheek when she does something adorable. The way you inquire your dad about how he takes care of your mom. The way you dress according to your mood, blue if you feel gloomy and white when you feel fresh and happy. I mean I just can’t help myself from not noticing you. Every little thing you do gets a smile on my face. Things as little as your status updates.’

I saw Ms. Mahalingam coming back from the counter and she directly went towards Pri.

‘Chale?’ She asked her like she wanted to drag her off from there. She personally never liked me. I was a typical South Indian Tamilian Bhramin. Jayachandra Eeshwaran Iyer. She always thought it was a crime for her to talk to me unlike Pri who almost all the time enjoyed my company. But as I said Ms. Mahalingam was the leader of DOB. She knew how to wash brains with Sabeena.

‘Aap jayeeye main aa rahi hoon.’ She replied.

And I was wondering like did she actually shoo the DOB off. Back to where I was.

‘I mean everything you do make me believe that this world is such a beautiful place to live. I’m sorry I can’t make you feel the way I see you. But there has been nothing in my life that I have wanted so much as much as I want you. I know I called you a BITCH and you know why I called you so. But I know and you know better than me that I would do anything and absolutely anything to undo it. You say it is never gonna work between us. I mean how can you say that unless you give it a chance?

My knees were hurting now. I could see her expressions changing. From anger to frustration to pity to love to anger. It was like a cycle.

I still continued. ’Girl I don’t know what to say.’ I picked up the paper stub from my pocket. ‘I tried to write a whole page of what to say and what not to say to you but when I ended up on my knees all I could remember was how you keep naming stuff toys and every random thing that someone around you buys or gifts. That funny orange glasses of yours. How you don’t like to tie your hair but yet do it every day. The only things I could remember were things about you and not what I rehearsed and re-rehearsed for the past three hours.

I kind of figured out that I was talking about almost everything on this planet except for what I really had to tell her. But at least I wasn’t lying. I thought it would be really good if I tell it to her than creating such a melodrama. Even the canteen in-charge was staring at us as though he would take my ID card off.

‘Pri, I just wanna tell you that I really love you. I’ve gotta do nothing with the dogs or the bats. I’m just an ordinary guy who is madly in love with you. I can’t promise you of stupid movie dialogues like breaking the moon and stuff but I can promise you of only of one thing. If you get up at three in the morning just to have a cup of tea then you would find a glass of hot tea already on the study table right next to you. I can’t say anything more than this. Will you please be the girl for whom I can learn how to make a cup of tea?’

I could see her face still unchanged from what it was at the beginning of the conversation. But I could notice her eyes were kind of wet. I knew I had pissed her off enough and now I had embarrassed her in front of almost half the college. But then again you get this odd feeling when you know no matter what happens to you it is going to end right and I exactly had the same feeling right now.

She looked at me for another five seconds. I was still on my knees but not looking foolish like SRK. I had my hands on my thighs not half in the air. She rubbed her right eye with her ring finger like something had gone inside it.

And she said, ‘Sunn…’

--------xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx--------

I have always wanted to write this piece but never knew how to end it. Nor do I know how to end it now. As some people say “There is someone above who writes our stories.” Hoping for him to complete this piece on my behalf. 

Eat well sleep safe.. Take care.. Have a Nice Day.. Sayonara.. =)

Three Faces of my Coin

She was sitting in front me listening to an old Bryan Adams number (Cuts like a Knife). It was our favorite song. HE was playing with her hair and cuddling her. I think HE cracked one of his stupid jokes; I could make that out by her trademark giggle. She was very happy. And that was for the first time I realized that I was in LOVE with her.

I knew Nikita from the past six months. We happened to be classmates. Since then we have turned out to become great friends. Those kinds when, last night, you pick up a strong abusive verbal fight in front of the whole college where she calls you a whore and swears to God that she is breaking up your friendship and the next morning she gives you a call and says, ‘Dude, where the FUCK are you? The class is about to start.’ You end up having dinner in the same plate because she is lazy enough to get herself a plate. Or the other time when you are invited to a boring party at your friend’s place and you have his whole house to sleep yet you prefer to hold her hand and keep you head on her shoulder and sleep.

She was the perfect friend you could ask for and I never wanted anything more than that. It was simply PERFECT. But then I don’t know why I was feeling so hard to digest the way HE was playing with her hair. It was not that he was her special one. He was just another friend of hers. Her school-mate and yet I was not comfortable.

And may be because I loved her so much, I was feeling so irritated with his behavior. As they say, ‘You don’t need time to love someone, you just need a moment.’ This was my MOMENT. And I was so floating in my moment that I blurted out loud, ‘NIKI (a second pause), I LOVE YOU.’ Before I could realize what I had done, she turns back with a *Fuck you Bastard, you needed so long to tell this* expression and gives a tight hug and says, ‘I LOVE YOU TOO BABY’ and gives a kiss on my cheek.

Happies Endings.

Well not actually. Because that is when I remembered that I had said the exact same line for the second time in the past 15 hours to a girl. I mean two different girls.

RHEA. That was her name.

INTERMISSION…

Well life was in an Intermission Mode now. The mode when the screen goes blank and you wonder what’s going to happen next.

Back to RHEA. Rhea was my Deepika of Break ke Baad. We knew each other since we were 3 years old. We went to the same school, same class, same tuitions, same painting classes, same, well you get the picture right. For almost 17 years we lived the same lives. Then I was couriered to this business school while she went to a Film school in Pune. And that was when we became conscious of what we shared between us. We were so used to each other that we didn’t even have time to realize that we loved each other.

I still remember when she was 10 she tripped over the 18 foot slide and ended up fracturing her hand. And the best part which I got to know later was when she smiled. Six of her teeth were broken completely. I used to run to the hospital after the school and stayed there till my mom use to drag me back home for almost a week. And then once when we were in tenth grade she didn’t come home till 9 in the night. So I had to take my cycle and stray almost half the city, going to all her friend’s places (Damn, Mobiles were not there then). But later found out that she had fallen asleep in her cupboard. The smile on her face while she was sleeping spit upon the fire of my anger. Angel.

Last night we were sitting on my terrace for the first time in six months. She was in my arms eating the last piece of a home baked cake (I had baked it). It was simply PERFECT (I know I said it with Nikita also but it actually was). I didn’t want to lose her and I was GODDAMN sure even she felt the same. I saw a curtain holder clip next to me and I knew if not now then never. I picked it up, took her hand in mine, put that thing through her finger and said ‘RHEA (a second pause), I LOVE YOU’. She said nothing. She looked into my eyes for a little more than a couple of seconds and then she moved her head upwards and the next thing I know was that we were kissing.

So now I was still struck in Nikita’s arms thinking what I am going to do next. I didn’t want to lie to any of them. But I knew that the truth would take them both away from me.

Lot of people may now say it is just an INFATUATION. You will get over one of them soon. Probably you wouldn’t cycle half the city at 10 in the night or abuse someone in front of the whole college and end up in each other’s arms the next morning if you are infatuated to someone. I was dead sure that I loved them both. I was sure it would be impossible for me to live with losing either of them.

They say every rule has an exception. I believe this was my EXCEPTION.

HAPPIES ENDINGS???


Dedicated to Sithara Ramesh (The Girl who always snatches away my book to read what I'm writing).


Eat well sleep safe.. Take care.. Have a Nice Day.. Sayonara.. =)

MISS(ed) SMILE

Remember those posters which say SMILE, it costs nothing. Well those posters are such a fabrication of truth. Last night I saw one of these at the railway station, I was off to receive my friend. It was around half past nine and as usual the place was just like three dogs mating. Over-crowded. Some say I was lucky enough to get a seat on the platform. To be frank it sucked. I was sitting between a lady who was stinking of local alcohol and a guy who was touching himself in his sleep.

Well thank God; he was kind enough because I just lift my foot as they were hurting and a kid in front of me pukes. If this was not it, the squeaky clamor tore my ears apart. Everything in the station, living or dead made some noise or the other to kill my tolerance. And finally I decided to go outside the station and wait for her.

How do I always manage to end up into something I never want to be in and yet smile at it and say ‘Worse things happen ’. This was one of those abhorical situations. I get up and start walking towards the entrance talking on my phone. What was supposed to be a very easy process (stand, walk, reach and exit) turned out to be a calamity because I just missed the bottleneck of the process. ‘Look Around’. And I bump into this girl.  

*Girl. Fair. Hair, pitch dark black, a little longer than the shoulder length. Eyes sparkling coffee brown. Pierced nose. Dark yellow tee with a cartoon of Marge Simpsons. Black boots with a blue skin tight denim*

She was just the way my grandmother used to describe the princesses in her fairytales. Especially with that butterfly tattoo on her neck (Oh damn, I make such a bad writer. How come I forgot to plant the tattoo in her description) she seriously was looking GODDAMN CUTE. I somehow managed to get a sorry out of my mouth. All she said was “That’s ok.” And she started moving.

*That’s ok*.  That’s it??? Come on. A slap or at least a couple of swears. She was just too pretty for me to let her go with just a “That’s ok”. I desperately wanted to talk to her more. She was one of those kinds, the Anne Hathaway kind with a sprinkle of Penelope Cruz in her. So I just decide to go and try my luck. If the crossbreed turns back, I go talk to her otherwise I stay and stare (actually letch). After a solid two minutes of Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge stereotype I discover that my luck isn’t lucky enough so I stand and letch.

I sneaked around whenever possible to just get a quick look at her. Of all girls I’ve met, I’ve always heard a wonderful philosophy from them that a girl will instantly get to know if a guy is checking her out, even if he is a mile away. I never believed them. But after seeing what was happening in front of me I was forced to believe the tabooed philosophy. Because this time when I tried to get a peek at her, she was standing a lot closer to me than she was a couple of minutes ago (say like as close as the 6 yard box from the goal, she was standing on the Dee line before).

Now  she was squiggling her hair with one hand and talking on the phone with the other like a 6 year old who just got a new toy phone which made her look even more prettier. I just couldn’t resist myself from smiling (She was way too hyper-active). The worse part starts here because this time she catches me letching at her and gives me an aggressive Sreeshanth grin. I thought of calling the game off but I just didn’t want to lose her off my sight.

She caught me a couple of more times letching at her but I still didn’t stop because I just wanted to talk to her. If I could not pull a conversation with her at least I could make her pull one. This went on for another ten minutes and I knew this was leading to nothing. So I finally decide to go to her and start the conversation.

The feeling is just like the one you get before you sky – dive or jump off a tall water slide. You so badly want to do it but still the lump inside says ‘You know you don’t wanna do it’. But still you do it. So I went to do it. But then some bitch who is always known for opening her mouth at the wrong time comes up with ‘Krupya dyaan de Dilli jaane wali rail 2627 platform number 2 pe aa rahi hai’ and that too with a Dolby Digital sound’s for the deprived.

Bullocks.

She picks her bag and leaves for the train. I was standing two yards away from her like a jackass. Of all the things I had been thinking for the past half hour, talking to her topped the list and here I was looking at her going away. But then as always the masochistic ego proves its existence. The famous alter-ego says ‘Chuck her. She wasn’t that good (inspired by The Fox and the Grapes Epic’. Things would have been good if it had ended there. But miracles do happen when you LEAST want them to happen.

She climbs in her compartment. Then when you expect the train to move she peeks out and SMILES.  And now the train moves.

All I did for the next ten seconds was just smile back. *Damn. Number… Name… Something… Holy Fart!!! Missed her* That was what I did for the next thirty minutes after the ten seconds.

Now she just remains in my boob memory as Ms. SMILE reminding me how big a boob i was. Actually a wuss. The list goes on.

*MISS SMILE… MISS(ed) SMILE*

Dedicated to Nikhil Narsapur (The WUSS).

Eat well sleep safe.. Take care.. Have a Nice Day.. Sayonara.. =)

Chutney Case

chutney 

n.

           a pickle of Indian origin, made from fruit, vinegar, spices, sugar, etc. mango chutney.

Chutney Case, that’s what I called her. The girl who ruined my primary school experience (especially my 2^nd standard). I still remember it was an English class. Nirmala Miss was teaching ‘Kutchu forgot his Glasses’ and suddenly the peon (Kasturi) comes and calls Nirmala Miss outside. So before going she called Pooja and asks her to ‘mind’ the class.

Pooja walks up to the teachers table where a wooden box neatly decorated with a blue color paper having pictures of flowers on it and named ‘CHAAK BOX’ (Chalk Box) was kept. She picks up a yellow chalk and writes in block letters on the board, ‘NAMES’ and underlines it with a curvy line.

The whole class went quite as soon as she wrote it because everyone knew that whosoever name would be on the board would have to taste ‘THREE HITS’ on the ‘KNUCKLES’ and had to ‘KNEEL DOWN, HANDS UP’ for the whole class. Nirmala Miss was another name for terror in the whole school.

I had already forgotten to do my last class’s homework and was trying hard to finish it now. In that rush I knocked my rubber which popped out my table and fell down behind my bench. So I turn back and pick it up. But what was terrifying was that my name was on the board.

I could see ’KIKO’ written in big jokerman handwriting below the heading ‘Names’. I got very angry because I was not talking so I call Pooja and say, ‘I wasn’t TALKING ya’.

‘Shut up man. I seeing you back turned’, she replied.

‘No ya, I not TALK at all. My RUBBER fall down ya, GOD PROMISE. Rub my NAME ya’, I said.

She was adamant. She started acting as though she was the  class leader. Technically I got pissed off and I scream, ’Oi STUPID, how many times I tell ya, I not talking. Rub my name or I tell everyone never ever, ever never talk to you. You MONKEY, DONKEY, IDI…’, before I could complete my sentence I could hear someone screaming out my name aloud.

By the voice, I could make out that it was pleasant. I look at the door and see a huge dark lady with black fat glasses. She had a waistline of 48’ and her teeth bunnied out with the front one half broken. She never looked pleased or happy. She was Nirmala Miss.

I knew she had heard the conversation and was not happy with it. She calls me to the teachers table. I could look at her grin and say that she was surely going to hurt me real bad. She takes out the iron scale from her attendance register and asks me to fist my hand. What succeeded were TEN HARD KNUCKLE SHOTS and a week full of KNEELING DOWN outside the class.

For one week everyone in the school saw a little kid kneeling down outside the class. I had become the topic of sympathy and that was like a candle of embarrassment for me. It burnt me from inside. I started hating POOJA. That was the last time I spoke to POOJA. I started calling her CHUTNEY CASE and spread the CHUTNEY CASE fever to the whole school. I started teasing her, gluing her books and every possible thing to make her cry. I made her life miserable in school. Three years later, her dad got transfer and she left the school. And in a due course of time CHUTNEY CASE was just a bitter memory. But I hated her to the core. I was her worst nightmare in the school. That was the story twelve years ago. A tale of HATRED and REVENGE.

Today morning I just signed into my Facebook account and found that I had a got a friend request from a girl named POOJA M. A click later I found out that it was CHUTNEY CASE.

What I’ve learnt: I just realized how dumb I had been. It was like the puzzle was complete. It was like a circle. Starting everything from the beginning. This world was so small for a heavy word like HATRED. And it is not peace that we should spread but love. Because today PEACE just means that you have a BIGGER STICK than the OTHERS. Spread LOVE and PEACE PREVAILS.


P. S. http://www.chutneycase.com/search?updated-max=2010-01-10T23%3A39%3A00%2B05%3A30&max-results=4


The REAL INSPIRATION...

Eat well sleep safe.. Take care.. Have a Nice Day.. Sayonara.. =)

Chimera – Can Love be an illusion? Episode - 1

It’s been three weeks since I’ve spoken to her. I see her all the time. Even now. She is playing with her hair right in front of me. But I still can’t talk to her. They are watching me. They don’t want me to talk to her. They hate her. They all hate her.

Six months ago…

It was a Sunday. I remember very well. I was waiting at Inox theaters with an extra ticket in my hand (thanks to Rishi who ditched me at the last moment). Sometimes it so happens that some things don’t go according to your plan and you are actually very happy that the plan didn’t go well. Well, this was one of those ‘sometimes’. Because just before I go inside the theatre, this cute girl with a smile comes up to me and asks “Hey, do you by any ‘chance’ have an extra ticket?”

Chance. That was the word. It seriously was a chance to be sitting next to someone like this in a cheesy movie. It was always a fantasy for me. So I give her the ticket and we go watch the movie. After all said and done we end up talking and not watching the movie. We come out of the theatre and then we decide to watch the movie again, watch the movie (Thanks to my impulsiveness). So I buy the tickets and we go to watch the movie. And again end up talking the whole movie (but I don’t think we had to blame anyone. We just enjoyed it). It was around 8:30 when we came out. So I decide to walk her home.

We walk for around four and a half kilometers to her ‘Adi, I just stay ten minutes away from here, can you please walk me down?’ My legs were hurting bad but still I just enjoyed walking with her. She just couldn’t stop talking and I just couldn’t stop listening to her. Oh damn, she was so indescribable. Finally we reach her place. Her house turned out to be a mansion. Pretty old one. Around 120 years old but it didn’t look so. Everything was perfect except that there was no moon. I so didn’t feel like leaving her. But it was late and if I was not home in another half hour my mom would have kindly locked the gates and dropped my blanket on the compound. So I just leave her outside the gate like an ass and sped back home.

It was ages since I had been so excited. I just couldn’t stop thinking about her. I take my phone to call her up and then I realize how SMART I was? I totally forgot to take her number. My impulsiveness is so organized. It always knows when to checkmate me. I was feeling so desperate to talk to her now. So I finally decide that I’m going to her place tomorrow. But the problem was there was still 9 hours for my ‘tomorrow’ and I swear to God I couldn’t wait that long.

Waiting for my watch to show 10 a.m. was just like a gestation period for a cow. The journey so painful but the result so legendary.

10:50 a.m.

I’ve been waiting outside her mansion for almost forty five minutes now. I just didn’t have the courage to go inside. I was scared that she would refuse to recognize me or may be the mansion may just collapse as soon as I step in. I was just scared.

I walk in and see the huge garden and a small pathway towards the door. I pluck a rose from her garden hoping that she wouldn’t realize. I walk up to her door just to see her door locked.


I just thought she might have gone out somewhere and I shall drop sometime later. I was about to leave but saw this lady near the gate. I just couldn’t resist myself but ask her why the house was locked. She just said ‘Yahaan pe toh koi nahi rehta hai’. For the next five seconds I was stunned. I was like this can’t be happening. I dropped her here last night and now I get to know that this house is abandoned. But I refused to believe her. I just couldn’t. But still, the doors were locked. The doors were locked. She couldn’t possibly be lying to me. But still, the doors were locked.

to be continued…

Eat well sleep safe.. Take care.. Have a Nice Day.. Sayonara.. =)

And Then,

Mortality is a boon given by GOD as long as you don’t make it a CURSE…

They say one should be courageous enough to kill oneself but long stated that suicide is an act of cowardice. Well though the former makes a lot of sense, the latter justifies the truth. Life ain’t a banana peel to be scraped off before enjoying the fruit. We also fail to realize that the scraped banana peel can act as a source of parity to trip a lot of people around you. How lame and selfish can someone be? Not just you end your life but also you are ending the dreams and joys of the people around you who care for you, who love you and sometimes may be who just are living because, YOU ARE.

I agree life ain’t sweet to us always but then again what’s the fun if we don’t fight for it. Bitter moments do exist in life. That doesn’t even give you a valid reason to kill yourself.

Wondering what is this shit all about? Let me tell you. I get up in the morning and open the newspaper for the first time. The first thing I read ‘Girl jumps in front of running elephant to commit suicide. Elephant trips and passes away’. Funny huh? Not for the elephant though. On a serious note, the headline read ‘Girl jumps off from an eight – storey apartment, but survives’. Yes she did survive but the latter part of the news also said she had 17 irreversible fractures and her mother passed away due to shock. The reason as according to the source was that she didn’t get through some very reputed college because her marks were less than the cut off. Just by a couple. Really, is our life just worth a college seat? Or may be a sweetheart (who actually never respected you)? Is suicide the only way to solve your problems? To attain liberation?

I just couldn’t resist but write about this issue. That news actually hurt me. Thinking about that girl’s mother? Her irreversible fractures?

Kevin Bernhardt quoted life has just three rules.  Paradox, humour, and change. 

1.   Paradox: Life is a mystery. Don't waste time trying to figure it out. 

2.   Humour: Keep a sense of humour, especially about yourself. It is strength beyond all

measure. 

3.   Change: Know that nothing stays the same. 

Well sounds so philosophical but surely ain’t no LIE. Suicide is not a solution. It is an act of helplessness and hopelessness. More of the latter.

What I’ve Learnt: Death isn’t sad. It is just that we don’t live at all.  There are NO ORDINARY MOMENTS. The day you realize it you’ll get to know how special your LIFE is. The JOURNEY is what brings us HAPPINESS not the DESTINATION. Death is just a mere destination. 

Eat well sleep safe.. Take care.. Have a Nice Day.. Sayonara.. =)

Gandhi taught Me

If I were you and you were me,

I would make the selfish you, WE.

BULLSHIT. I still wonder what was I thinking when I wrote those two lines three months back. Well, to be honest I was trying to be GANDHI. You read it right. GANDHI and his acts of SELFLESSNESS. BULLSHIT again. The whole theory of making people happy, giving them surprises fascinated me so much. The simple reason being the smile on their face when they got those surprises or so called moments. Well that included waiting for them at the bus-stop, giving a surprise birthday party, gift wrapping a smelly dead rat with its intestine out (oops that didn’t include any smile) and lately even jumping off a moving bus (that almost killed me, but worth it *then*) and even lamer stuffs. I just look back now and see what a mess I had made of myself.

I had completely substituted YO – YO in people’s life. Woah!!! Kingpin marketers couldn’t come up with a substitute for a YO – YO. It was just like they had tied a thread to my wiinis. All I did was swing according to their wish.

Well, it just took me a six seat dinner table with five empty chairs and a plate of tasteless food to realize that on the last day of your life, its only YOU who have travelled the whole journey. So there is no point in pleasing any Tom, Harry or even DICK because even he is going to dump you some day. It’s not a sin in being SELFISH.

And I’m glad I am one (from today)

What I’ve learnt: When you are rescuing someone from a well and that person pulls you inside instead then just drown him first and FLOAT ON HIM.

Eat well sleep safe.. Take care.. Have a Nice Day.. Sayonara.. =)

Pray for my Angel....

At some point of time, we all go through this phase, where we just feel that we’ve lost everything. Nothing we want is with us. Your neighbor turns out to be a SUPER SEXY HOT MODEL, you get a 99 in your exams but yet you discover that she’s GAY and you just lost your seat by 0.1%.

But in my case, I wasn’t even that lucky. I neither got a neighbor nor could me at least clear a straight 60. People said “Patience is the virtue”. They asked me to just wait. “Right things do happen at right time”. I thought; let me give it a shot. So I waited. And waited. And waited a little more. But then realized that my life was like a “SNOOZE” button for god. Every time I scream “Alarm” “Alarm”, he just pressed “Snooze” and slept a little longer. Patience was indeed a virtue. A virtue for PESSIMISM.

So I finally decided to go on ISOLATION. I stopped playing, talking, laughing, and basically stopped doing anything and everything that involved people in it. It was all me everywhere. I got more time to spend with myself. And it was during that time I actually I realized what were my deepest desires. I was actually feeling good. Basically for the fact that I don’t have to share anything with anyone. But then again I forgot this basic truth that it is not only happiness that I got to share; I also have sorrow, grief and anguish.

I wanted to share them but I just couldn’t find someone because I just didn’t trust anyone. Trust was a simple 5 letter word which was beyond my comprehension. Things go right or wrong, I was happy that I got no one else but me to blame for it. So isolation was great. Till the day I met this angel.

No. It’s not another love story. In fact, it is more motivational and weary. It’s actually after seeing this angel I just learnt what I was missing all my life. I didn’t even realize how and when did I go through this whole TRANSFORMATION. All I remember is that smile on that angel’s face.

I just wanted to know the secret behind that smile because I never saw the angel without the smile. So one day, I just went to the angel and asked it the secret. It replied, “To know the reason behind my secret, you have to stay with me for a fortnight”. Fifteen days was not a bad bargain to find the secret of that smile. So I just agreed. But never in the wildest dreams did I ever imagine what would happen in the next fifteen days.

Days passed by like the spring’s breeze. Not hot not cold. And all I could see everyday was a new trouble tied to this angel’s neck. It had a new trouble at every sunrise and a new problem at every sunset and yet it managed to make its smile shine like gold. At the end of the fifteenth day, I had seen the angel in the worst situations of life but still with a sparking smile. I was confused. So I just asked it, “What is it that makes you to go on for more in life? I’ve never seen anyone living a life which is as hard as yours and of those whom I have seen; I’ve never noticed a smile on their face? Why is it that I have never seen a tear on your face?”

It simply replied, “I live life with HOPE. HOPE that tomorrow life’s got a surprise for me. that tomorrow I find another friend like you who gives me another reason to smile. HOPE. I just HOPE.”

What I’ve learnt: I always saw this angel and thought how happy it was. But never even knew that it was going through situations worse than that of mine. A petite word which had the secret to happiness on this planet. HOPE. HOPE to believe in yourself when others don’t.

This part of the post is not a post-script or a foot-note. It is a genuine and a humble request of mine. A couple of days ago, for the first time I saw TEARDROPS in my angel’s eye. It came to me and asked me to help it. And I didn’t know what to do. I just could not repay the angel for the new verve it had given me. So I just thought may be you can help me. All I request you are after reading this post please pray the LORD for just five seconds that MAY MY ANGEL GET WHAT IT WANTS. I HOPE that you will do this small favor for me. PLEASE…. I love my angel and I’m sure even you would if you see it. PLEASE PRAY FOR IT. THAT’S THE WHOLE REASON FOR ME TO WRITE THIS POST.

Eat well, Sleep safe. Sayonara

Have a Nice Day [=)]